Erap, Noynoy, Gibo, and… Conyo (!?)


ANC cable news channel is to Noynoy Aquino what FOX News Channel is to the US Republican Party…but 100 times more! Some people even believe ANC stands for: AQUINO, Ninoy & Cory. Who needs expensive infomercials? Eat your heart out, Senator Villar, et al.

Have you seen the “Akala Mo” music-video infomercial of Senator Villar? The second line goes “Akala mo CONYO yung pala, laking Tondo.” The word CONYO alludes to the often used “expression” of “tisoys” (Spanish mestizos) in this country; in short, in the context of the infomercial, Conyo means  “tisoy-bourgeoisie,” hence, “akala mo ‘conyo,’ yung pala laking Tondo.” We wonder if the producers of this video are aware of what that Spanish expletive  literally means and what it translates to in Tagalog or English. In English, the equivalent of Conyo would be, plain and simple, the most “private part” of a woman but in its most crass English slang — c_ _ _ (rhymes with “blunt”). We’re surprised no one has given Senator Villar or his handlers flack for this.

For those that would make Erap’s age an issue (we think he’s qualified to run — let the people decide if they want him) in the coming Presidential elections, here are some adages you might consider before coming to a conclusion: “age is all in the mind;” “you’re only as old as you feel;” “age is relative;” and “older but wiser.” On the other hand, you may also wish to ponder these facts: for those that have just turned 18 years old (voting age), multiply that by 2 and you’re still only half Erap’s age; Erap is more than three decades older than his youngest opponent; Elvis and Erap are about the same age; if you’re between 18 years old and 25 years old, Erap would still be decades older than your mom; and, the job of a President requires, at least, a twelve to fourteen hour work day (mostly day time, not night time) requiring physical and mental stamina.

When Erap over-heard a teenager greet his friend with, “Hey… Dude!” he tried to impress the youngsters by telling them that he, “too,” was aware of that Beatles’ hit song and even knew the words to the song as he sang, “Hey, Jude…take a sad song, and make it better.” The youngsters gave him a bewildered smile and went their way. Erap: minus two votes.

Erap is to “Erap para sa mahirap…” as Dick Gordon is to “Mt. Pinatubo…” as Noynoy Aquino is to “ang aking mga magulang…” as Manny Villar is to “nang galing ako sa mahirap….” Besides their personal mantras and hackneyed “motherhood statements,” we still have to hear from them their platforms of government and their vision for the country. “Huh, what for!?” Sorry…

A lot of people lament the fact that Defense Secretary Gibo Teodoro is arguably the most qualified among those aspiring to be President but, sadly, is running under the “wrong” party. It would be interesting to see how he can manage to run under the administration party yet distance himself from it as he must if he is to win; looks like he’s in a stalemate. Meanwhile, Secretary Puno has backed out from his plans to seek the Vice-Presidency; the “political guru” must have found out something that has made him change his mind. Survey says!? And who could be leading the pack for Vice-President? As long as Chiz Escudero stays away from seeking the Vice-Presidency, Mar Roxas will be the man to beat for Vice President.

Before the death of President Cory Aquino, the Liberal Party did not think much of Senator Noynoy Aquino as a candidate for President, or even Vice President for that matter, simply because they did not think he had the credentials, experience, ability and wisdom to lead the nation. Those attributes, they saw in Mar Roxas and rightly so. After the death of the late President Aquino and seeing the large crowd that came out to mourn her death, the very same people that considered Noynoy lacking in qualification to be the next President suddenly saw in him not only  the one  most qualified but  the savior, the messiah this country had been waiting for. This sudden “enlightenment” and “illumination” that brought about the revision in the Liberal Party’s choice for it’s standard bearer begs these questions: how did Cory’s death bring about the “realization” that Noynoy was, after all, not only qualified but  the more qualified (more than Mar) to be the Liberal Party’s standard bearer? Would this “realization” have come about if the former President had not passed away when she did and what on earth does one have to do with the other? Or, is the Liberal Party about fielding the candidates that have the best chances of winning, irregardless,  rather than fielding the most competent within their ranks? Let’s hear it from the… Spinners!

A group of rich Germans has launched a petition calling for their government to make wealthy people (with fortunes of more than half a million Euros) pay higher taxes. The group says they “have more money than they need.” Germany could raise 100bn euros (!) if the richest people paid a 5% wealth tax for two years, they say. One signatory, a Peter Vollmer, told AFP news agency he was supporting the proposal because he had inherited “a lot of money I do not need.” He said the tax would be “a viable and socially acceptable way out of the flagrant budget crisis.” The group held a demonstration in Berlin about twenty days ago to draw attention to their plans. They obviously realize it’s better to be wealthy in a wealthy country than to be wealthy in a “poor” country.
Let’s not hold our breaths expecting the rich of this country to do likewise. Chances are, they’re busy with their accountants finding more ways to lessen the taxes they have to pay.

Chiz Escudero lobbed a big surprise at the crowd that attended his press conference when, instead of formally declaring his candidacy for President as was expected,  he announced that he had quit the NPC and the “party system” – the need for a Presidentiable to run under a political party. He then asked his supporters to give him time to think things over. It seems he may be too young after all.

Chinese proverb: “If at first you don’t succeed, perhaps, sky-diving wasn’t meant for you.”

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